June 15

Father’s Day for Alienated Fathers


Father's Day can be a challenging holiday for fathers who do not have a relationship with their children. Even for father's who have a relationship with their children, albeit a difficult one. Wherever you are at, it is important to do something for you this Father's Day. 

  1. Practice self-care: Take time for yourself and do something that makes you feel good. Whether that's going for a hike, going in the sauna or steam room, hitting a fitness class, or treating yourself to your favorite meal--make sure to prioritize your own wellbeing. Splurge on an activity you have been wanting to do, or spend time with a friend and do something fun together. 
  2. Practice gratitude: Take some time to journal this weekend. Focus on the positive aspects of your life and the things you are grateful for. Jot down what makes you a great father. This can help shift your mindset and bring some joy to the day. 
  3. Release pressure: While this is certainly a day to honor all fathers, it can be pressuring to have the 'perfect' day. If you have your kids but they are emotionally cutoff - deflate pressure and anxiety on Father's Day by treating it like normal. Release expectations, and ease the suffering for your kids by treating it like a typical day. Maybe invite a friend over and do something altogether.
  4. Connect with other dads: Reach out to other fathers who may be in a similar situation. Join online support groups or attend local events where you can meet and connect. Do something fun together. Even if it has to be a virtual meet up! If the 2020 taught us anything, it's that we can make do with the internet if need be!
  5. Volunteer: Consider volunteering for a cause that is important to you. Helping others can be a great way to feel good and give back on Father's Day.
  6. Allow yourself to process emotions: Remember, it's okay to feel a range of emotions on Father's Day. Be kind to yourself and prioritize your own wellbeing. Keep focused on reunification, without dwelling in the negativity of the day. 
  7. Stay off the web: If it is going to trigger you, steer clear from social media if you know other dads who spend the day with their children. Or, practice unconditional love and consciousness, and be happy for them! Integrate their happiness and focus on wanting that for you and your children. Also while keeping in mind that social media is a stomping ground for trying to create a picture-perfect life. Not everything is what it seems! 
  8. Celebrate you! Above all else, make sure you celebrate yourself as the powerful dad that you are.

Father's Day is a day to take some extra time to appreciate all the father roles in our lives, even ourselves. Ponder on the relationship with your own father. Then make sure to remind yourself what makes you a great dad, and the purpose of the day. That as fathers, we love our children unconditionally.

Whether you have adult children, want to boost your co-parenting skills, or whether you want to heal your own story and become the higher-purpose parent you were meant to be, gift yourself the gift that continuously gives over and over: a Chosen Parent Collective membership or starting one of our online programs. When you invest in yourself as a parent, the rewards benefit your children, too. Get started today. 

...if you're a dad or mom whose co-parent is a father, check out this separate blog post here


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